Mar 31, 2012
Yesterday I received a comment from an unknown person to a post I wrote about a month ago. I was really hesitant whether or not to “approve” the comment for posting, because the writer seemed a bit inflammatory, the comment seemed like it was baiting me for feedback, to be defensive.
And while I wanted to delete the comment, or defend my writing, I chose to do neither. As a writer, I’m obviously a proponent of free speech. Just because I don’t agree with what someone says, doesn’t mean they don’t have the right to say it, even on my own blog.
Now, obviously I’m not going to allow abusive or profane remarks. This one was neither. It was someone who disagreed with, and perhaps misinterpreted, what I said. That’s okay, too.
What kind of writer would I be if I didn’t accept a little criticism now and then? My blog is just that: my postings of my feelings, my thoughts, my world. What kind of self-centered person would I be if I only kept it to myself? How does that fulfill my goal of being an accepted writer? And just as my blog is mine, others’ comments are theirs. Who am I to belittle their thoughts, their feelings?
On the other hand, leaving a comment for the sake of stirring things up is pretty… well, it’s ridiculous. So after re-reading what that person wrote, I deleted it after all.
It’s not that I don’t want others to have their say. It’s that my blog is not gonna be their playground for pushing and shoving. And that’s exactly what it felt like. This person was trying to instigate conflict.
And to that, I say, no thank you.
I can find a buzillion better uses for my time, my efforts, and my blog.
And Frankly, My Dear… that’s all she wrote!
Nov 17, 2011
I’ve known Claudia for years. What I didn’t know, until I started blogging last year, is that she also likes to write. Accordingly, she likes to read. And, bonus!, she likes to read my blog.
Recently, she sent me this email:
“Blogging everyday is impressive, and it’s also one of the reasons I enjoy your blog. I subscribe to a few others, but posts often are few and far between so I lose interest. I like that yours comes everyday, and the funny thing is that your title alone makes me happy. I love that you call it “Frankly, my dear…” You don’t finish the phrase, which is probably a good thing, but I kind of always like that you write what you write and you do this without seemingly caring about our response. That’s refreshing. I don’t read your blogs everyday even though they come, but I always skim them to see if I might enjoy reading. A lot of times I do just skim, but then every now and then you’ll write something that really connects with me. I guess those random jewels mixed in with all the rest are why I take the time to skim…just in case :)”
When I first started my blog, I did a weekly Comment Commentary; where I’d respond to each and every comment. Sure, that was fine when my comments were one or two per post.
But as the blog grows, the comments increase. I couldn’t keep up with a personal reply to each and every comment (although I really do read them all, and wish I had the time to keep responding!).
When I got this email from Claudia tonight, it just made me feel special. She gets it. She gets what and why I write. She just gets it.
In her short email, she summarized my intent and belief for my blog: “you write what you write and you do this without seemingly caring about our response”. The code word there is “seemingly”. Because I do care. I care that what I write is accepted, promoted, and appreciated. It’s never my intent to offend, but just to offer light hearted daily life stories (and some great recipes!).
It’s a great blend of dreams, imagination, true life, and my observations of all of the above. And it can be work, at times, to make it seem effortless; to not let my current emotions color my posts (lucky you to never seldom hear me rant!) but that’s my job. You’re not a shrink, and I’m not a patient. This isn’t my way of finding healing through vicarious living. This isn’t a narcissistic attempt to gain attention.
It’s just me. Mixing up all the ingredients of life, and sharing them with you.
The comments are just icing on this delicious cake.
Thanks, Claudia.
