Eight Habits of a Slightly Unsuccessful Writer (Or, How to Write When You Don’t Take it Too Seriously)
Frankly, My Dear . . . : Eight Habits of a Slightly Unsuccessful Writer
~#~
But first, NOLA NOTE: I recently returned from my annual trip to the Blue Ridge Mountains Christian Writers Conference where I was told by several professionals I am, in fact, doing the Write Thing (aw, see what I did there?). Most importantly, the Godfather (who shall otherwise remain nameless, to protect the innocent) gave me some words of wisdom on how to proceed. In particular, he opened the conversation with, “Why didn’t you come to me for publishing advice?” To which I gulpedshiveredreplied, “I didn’t know I could.” Yeah. So, now I have a mentor for future writings, and, you know, a little eleventh-hour input into NOLA. I’d love to have y’all join my private Facebook group for more information, memes, and all-around fun. (Don’t worry, the Godfather won’t be there.) You can join on Facebook by clicking here: NOLA Swarm. [Side Note: Pray for the return of Bee the Zebra and Whisper, as they did not make their way home in the luggage, and are somewhere, I hope, still on the Ridgecrest Campus, waiting for my rescue.]
Frankly, My Dear . . . : Have you seen Whisper and Bee the Zebra?
And now, the post you’ve all been waiting for:
~#~
Eight Habits of a Slightly Unsuccessful Author:
Isolate yourself. Writers are lonely, crazy beings with no people skills whatsoever. We have no understanding of human nature, and say things we can’t edit. You most certainly will not learn anything by holding unnecessary conversations, especially with other writers. If you must socialize, do so in small groups, and in small doses.
Drink copious amounts of coffee. From noon to 3pm, drink gallons of decaf. At 6pm, drink another cup of espresso for good measure. Sleep two hours. Wake up and start all over. Your brain will thank you for it, even if your body doesn’t. If you must drink other than coffee, add something to it. Like fermented grapes.
Write, don’t read. You don’t have time to pay attention to someone else’s works. It’s imperative you put your own words on paper, in whatever fashion you can. There’s nothing to learn by reading classics or books within your genre. Who cares about the writing style of someone else, or supporting your friends already in print? If you must read, read outside your genre, and read things that will allow your mind to wander as your eyes skim the pages.
Don’t diversify your creativity. It’s best to focus on your writing and master it completely. Train your discipline. Give up photography, scrapbooking, creative journaling and the like. Other people have multiple interests, but that’s not you. So write. And, only write. If you must express creativity in other ways, don’t let others know about it. Don’t invest in it. And never share it on Instagram.
Write only what you know. Stay away from fantastical ideas, and topics you’re unfamiliar with. Research? Who has time for research? World-building? That’s too complicated. If you must write new material, use nonsensical words and settings and make it too complicated for others to understand.
Write when the muse hits you. Don’t worry about setting a time to write every day. Writer’s block? That’s for other writers, the ones who aren’t as focused. Because whenever you sit down, the words always flow without stopping. If you must write on a schedule, make sure to have multiple journals and lists available so you can jot a thousand grocery items and ten ways to fix the house as these thoughts will invariably demand your attention.
Don’t feed your muse. Stay away from inspirational movies and music. Don’t play with your food, enjoy nature walks, or travel. These will only inspire you in other ways and thus confuse your writing. If you must feed the muse, don’t enjoy the arts or have new experiences. This will only deter you from your true calling of being a writer.
Never, ever continue writing unless what you’ve already written is perfect. Brain-dumping and first drafts are myths and will not help you clear your head. Definitely do not use place-filler text [“Write Something Here About Rain’s past relationship with Cheryl and have him hint at why he no longer trusts Penny Jo”]. If you must write imperfectly and continuously, do not revisit those pages. They will only depress you and keep you from getting to the true heart of your story.
LEAVE A COMMENT: What tips and habits do you cultivate for your craft?
With a blank page and a full glass, Happy Writing. ~Molly Jo
Frankly, My Dear . . . Savor the Journey!
Frankly, My Dear . . . : Bohemian Hurricane
Molly Jo is better known as the Bohemian Hurricane. She is the author/curator of The Unemployment Cookbook and several eBooks available on Amazon. Her work-in-progress, NOLA, is a romantic mystery novel set in New Orleans, and the first in her City Series.
When you haven’t blogged in a month, but you don’t want your peeps to forget you, but you’re at your annual conference and forgot how busy this season is. And then you remember you have like, a *lot* of inspirational memes you share as a teaser until you get back into the habit of blogging.
Yeah, that.
Happy viewing, y’all. And, you know. #wishyouwerehere
Leave a comment and let me know which is your favorite.
Announcement and Cover Teaser
Say Hello to my nameless little friend.
Two types of birds …
Be the beautiful mosaic you’re meant to be.
You always have something to bring to the table.
Liz Taylor
MoJo rocking the Crazy Zebra Outfit (zebra leggings by LuLaRoe, Steve Jobs’ Crazy Ones speech on the T-Shirt)
Turn the knob
Choose the right vehicle.
Rest well.
Guts are messy.
Enjoy the journey.
Get back up.
Take care of yourself.
Talk yourself into success.
With a meme-making app and too many blog ideas to post, Happy Whatevering.
My (im-)Perfect Identity
(Or, How Someone Else’s Questionnaire Led Me to Decide Who I Want to Be)
~#~
NOLA NOTE: Before we get into today’s post, here’s the update: Just after I received the second round of edits last month, my trusted Babycakes II laptop had a nutty. After years of this wonderful relationship, it said, “I’m not liking you any more. I wanna break up. Or, at least, I just want to break.” Now, of course, bein’ the sweet talkin’ Bohemian Belle that I am, I very politely convinced it back into my lovin’ arms. [Read: After a glass of wine and some not-nice words, I salvaged what I could and continued.] Y’all know when you’re in a bad relationship but you just don’t want to own it? Here I was, thinking BCii was back on track. Treasuring our moments together, saving them for posterity. Until … scene jump to two weeks later. BCii and I are on the sofa watching some NCIS: New Orleans, of course. And it whines. And whistles. Mind you, I hadn’t even poked it for a few hours. So this calamitous noise was a little disconcerting. I took a look, asked what its problem was, and it didn’t respond. Zoiks! Insert crazywriterwoman face here! So the next day, I took it to the vetdoctoriStore and when I explained its attitude, the nice man behind the counter agreed it was time to date up. So I conveniently dropped BCii like the hot potato it had become, and got me a new Babycakes. Say hello to BCiii. After all the important information was transferred, I brought BCiii home only to discover BCii had, in its rebellious anger, corrupted the last two weeks of work. So. All those wonderful, genius edits my editor called out? I get to do some of them again. Let me finish by saying, I love NOLA. I love that BCiii loves NOLA, too. But I especially love my note-saving, text-reading, memory-keeping iCloud. Pray for me, y’all. This is a lot of work I hadn’t planned on redoing. This, and with the new day job, the finished product will be a little later than hoped for. But I’ll do it. Because Rain and Josie are worth it. And so are you, my Swarm. I’d love to have y’all join my private Facebook group for more information, memes, and all-around fun. You can join on Facebook by clicking here: NOLA Swarm.Stick around and see what happens . . .
I’ll be attending a writing intensive soon. The kind where the class is limited so the instructors can give one-on-one focus to the participants. The kind where they email you a questionnaire like the CIA is recruiting you for dark web espionage kind of skills. Okay, not really. But, almost. These questions lead you through a list of self-identifiers that are supposed to help you learn more about yourself, so you can learn more about how to present yourself to the world. Questions like, “What kind of music do you listen to?” (All kinds. Almost.) “What were your favorite books as a child?” (All of them. Especially with female heroines.) “How much coffee do you drink daily?” (Uhm, a lot.) “Do you like going to the movies?” (Does anyone not like going to the movies? If so, don’t answer. Just delete. Because we can’t be friends.)
Seriously, Ketchup Man. These are some personally invasive get-to-know-you questions that I don’t even ask on a first date. Well, okay. Maybe the movie and the coffee stuff. But then it gets grittier. Things like, “What do you want your audience to know about you?” “How do you want your audience to feel when they read your book?” “Who is your target audience?”
If I had all the answers, I wouldn’t need this questionnaire, or the class.
Frankly, My Dear . . . : My (im-)Perfect Identity
It’s all about writing, branding, writing, marketing, writing, identity, writing … wait. Identity? Are you serious?
I’ve been accused once or twice (or ten thousand times) of trying to be everything to everyone. Kinda reminds me of a scene in NOLA.
Frankly, My Dear . . . : My (im-)Perfect Identity – excerpt from NOLA by Molly Jo Realy
That doesn’t mean I don’t know who I am. It means I don’t always project it properly. Just recently I had the opportunity to discuss branding and identity with a client. I know. I’m a walking oxymoron. Truth is, we’re all good at giving advice, but we rarely seldom follow it. [I tried to find a video clip for Disney’s Alice in Wonderland singing “Very Good Advice”, but I couldn’t. Google it. You’ll get the picture.] I went through my normal tips of what makes a good marketing platform, how to claim your brand. And through the conversation, my muse kept dancing around in my mind, raising her hand and screaming, “I know! I know!”
Not wanting to claim your identity is not the same as not knowing it.
Thing is, I love all y’all. And I want to attract many, many more of you. So I tone it down. I chameleonize. But if I’m the one writing the script, if I’m being true to myself, you’ll see that, yah? I’m my best self when I’m, well, my best self. Authenticity is better than schmoozing with people you’re not sure you want to hang with after hours, amiright? Well, it’s the same principle IRL (Mom, that means “In Real Life”), and in your inner circles. You gotta trust them the accept you, and you gotta accept the ones you trust.
Networking is a two-way street. I don’t care what the subject is. High school girls at a coffee shop? Oliver and Lauren in Alrujah? Gypsies dancing on cobblestone? Steve Jobs recruiting computer builders? You have to know who you are, you have to own it, before you can ask someone else to invest in your world.
Once you own it, you have to live it.
How do you do that? Your brand should incorporate the part of you that’s easy to display, that draws others in. If you’re always the one at the coffee shop, I’m thinking a mug might be a good symbol. Are you a mechanic? Don’t use a stethoscope. What about the living part? Well, part of you doing you is curating those catch-phrases you’re known for.
When I was young, my brother and I were fairly convinced his name was “Let’s” and mine was “We’ll.” Because every Saturday morning after breakfast, Mom would clap and say, “Okay, let’s vacuum and we’ll dust the living room.” Good marketing, Mom. You could have been a cleaning commercial.
There are a lot aspects that go into making you, You. Remember my analogy of the million-dollar mosaic. We’re all a little broken. It’s how we put ourselves back together to let the sun shine through that makes us valuable.
I recently watched The Greatest Showman for the first time. I know, I know. It took me a while. But once I did, holymaloly. I downloaded that soundtrack right away; been singing it ever since. Y’all, I’m not making this stuff up. Go listen to the song, The Other Side. And then you do you like nobody else. Here’s the official soundtrack link from YouTube:
I know what my brand is, and I’m ready to share it. But before I do, for grins and giggles, leave a comment and tell me what you think my branding should be. And what yours is.
With some Bohemian hair and a magnifying glass,
Happy Identity.
~Molly Jo
Frankly, My Dear . . . Savor the Journey!
Frankly, My Dear . . . : Bohemian Hurricane
Molly Jo is better known as the Bohemian Belle. She is the author/curator of The Unemployment Cookbook and several eBooks available on Amazon. Her work-in-progress, NOLA, is a full-length location mystery novel set in New Orleans, and the first in her City Series.
FiF Fans ~ our newest episodes have been posted. Don’t forget to follow the Firsts in Fiction Facebook Page (and say that five times fast!) for updates, topics, and your opportunity to Ask the Author!
