Jan 10, 2012 |
I love my stability. I love my schedule. I love every so often letting loose and being spontaneous, because I know that I can return to my daughter, my recliner, my laptop, my cat, and my coffee. And I can count on those five things to be consistent.
I love having a routine. I love knowing what I can count on.
This is not news.
But this year, I’m daring to be a little more bold, a little more go-with-the-unknown. That’s so not the same as go-with-the-flow. The flow ebbs and tides, rises with the moon and sets with the sun. The unknown has no schedule for the moon or sun.
Today was my daughter’s first day back at school after over two weeks off for the holidays. She had a blast. She got to see her friends, her boyfriend, and was her typical social butterfly. She does great in school. I’m one proud Momma.
During her break, we took it easy and took each day as it came. Some were planned (holidays and friendly get-togethers), but overall we just woke up and decided to stay here or go there (lunch at Grandma’s, catch a movie). It was really a unique experience for me to be inconsistent for more than three days in a row.
I learned a few things about myself during the last few days. The first is, I like being laid back and semi-carefree. But I also like having the important things in order. I’ve learned what doesn’t cause me to lose sleep… and what does.
I’ve also discovered that having a plan and not following it can cause as much anxiety as not having a plan at all. ISN’T THERE A HAPPY MEDIUM SOMEWHERE?!
I feel better when I have a plan, a goal, a routine. Knowing what needs to get done, and planning for it gives me great satisfaction. Knowing what needs to get done, and ignoring it, pretty much cancels any need for caffeine. I hate being anxious over To-Do Lists.
So here is my happy little solution: Less To-Do Lists. More Unknown. Living in the Moment. Trusting God that as long as I’m doing what needs to be done, the rest doesn’t have to be scheduled, plotted out, planned for, or routinized.
Now if you’ll excuse me, I have a Not-To-Do List to write out.
And Frankly, My Dear… that’s all she wrote!
Jan 9, 2012 |
Started: January 1, 2012
Finished: January 8, 2012
[*It didn’t take me that long to read; I just had a few Do Nothing Days this last week. Actual reading was three days.]
What I loved best: While I always enjoy the return of our beloved Children and Aslan, I’d have to say my favorite part of this book was the character of Reepicheep, the Valiant Mouse. Most consider a mouse to be too small to be of any great assistance but Reepicheep doesn’t know that about himself. He thinks he has much to offer, and behaves so.
I also loved the many adventures in this story. It seemed that no sooner did one small event wrap up than everyone found themselves heading toward the still distant horizon.
Life is never what we expect it to be, and even though we can direct the paths in a general way, there will always be other people, other elements, other adventures that take us to places unthought of. Unthought of, but never unworthy. Just because it’s not the path we chose, that doesn’t mean it’s not the right path. It just means we don’t know it yet.
Jan 8, 2012 |
No sooner do I commit to Daring to Be an Awesome Orange, when the Fates decide to test my resolve.
I won’t go into great details, because it’s a horrifically long story, but the same day I choose my Three Words was the same day I ended up getting lost on the freeways of Southern California. Again. I will post that entire story some other time, but let’s just say that while I wanted to just pull over and call a cab, I didn’t have the money for a personal driver and then that darned word kept humming inside my head. Dare, it said. Dare to be daring. I dare you. And all I could think of was, this is pretty much the first adventure of the New Year. How would it look if I failed?
So I quickly got my bearings, turned around, and made it to my destination. The beauty of where I live is I could end up at the Beach, in the Mountains, or in East L.A., and still be just over an hour from home. Once I got on the right freeway, I took a deep breath, turned up the Frank Sinatra, and sang my way home. It was Awesome.
24 hours later, I got a call from Julie (for those of you new to my blog, Julie’s my best friend, my VIP, and next to my mom, she’s my Go-To Gal for relationships, parenting advice, girl talk… and coffee!). She needs my help next week in a big way. While she was telling me this, I found myself holding my breath.
I’m not opposed to helping out my friends, fundamentally. But when it comes down to it, I’m afraid of trying to help some friends, because I’m also afraid of letting them down. What if I make mistakes? What if I don’t do it right? What if I screw things up? I don’t want that hanging over our friendship. I don’t want to be un-friended on facebook for that. I want to keep my friends. And add new ones to the list.
But if I don’t step out and help Julie, she’ll never know that I really treasure her. I can’t keep our friendship in a bubble. She means enough to me to do things that make me nervous. Because I know she’d do the same for me. And I again had that word humming in my head. Dare. Dare. Dare! So I dared to say Yes. Yes, I can help. Yes, I can do a good job. Yes, our friendship will withstand the little mistakes we make. Yes.
And yes listening, really listening, to Monique, whom you’ll hear about soon. We’ve rekindled our friendship and she’s going to be a plethora of information as she and her fiance’ delve into the world of writing, formatting, publishing, and marketing together. I’ll be on the sidelines, cheering them on. Because I know when it’s my turn they’ll be doing the same.
And I bet our Pom Poms will be orange.
Who could ask for anything more?
And Frankly, My Dear… that’s all she wrote!
Jan 7, 2012 |
I’ve seen a trend on blogs this year. Rather than people writing out a long list of unaccomplishable Resolutions, the notion is to pick three, just three, words that are what you want to make the next year about.
For instance, you might pick the word health. This would eliminate a handful of specific resolutions such as “I will exercise daily” and “I will eat better” and “I will lower my calorie intake” and “I will eat a salad every lunch”.
Or you might pick achievements. This would encompass all those resolutions about work, success, striving…
Even though I already wrote out my Resolutions list, having three main words sounded like a good idea.
The first word that came to mind was Dare. I was going for “be daring”, but that’s two words so I opted for just dare. For me, this means to not just step out of my comfort zone now and then. It means, even when I’m afraid to go ahead and do something. It means to be more adventurous, and there’s all kinds of ways to do that. Experiment with my recipes. Step out in faith when I can’t see the foundation. Do the things I’m nervous about doing. Try something new. Keep trying at something old until I get it. Don’t give up. Don’t falter. Keep trudging. Dare to be great. Dare to be wonderful. Dare to accomplish. Just dare to do it.
My second word is Orange. “What an odd word,” you say. Well, let me explain. First, my kitchen is orange. I love it. It’s a very bright, refreshing color. Orange has always been my favorite fruit and fragrance. It’s such a wonderful color, that California even has a City and County named after it! And in this wonderful Orange County is a miraculous little place called Disneyland, also extravagantly orange in its decorations. Oranges are full of vitamins and fragrant juice and taste wonderful. Oranges are the best. One of my favorite quotes comes from Frank Sinatra: “Orange is the happiest color.”
I had a hard time coming up with my third word. I wanted something like successful or accomplished but everyone’s definitions are different. And let’s face it, without having a day job how successfully accomplished can I be? It’s a great word to strive for, but I’m not so sure even I can call myself successful right now. I’m getting there, to be sure. But I still wanted a different word.
Enter Disneyland (again!). I have a favorite T-Shirt that I wear almost every time I go there. It’s a black princess T and has a big red name badge screened on front that says “HELLO… My Name Is AWESOME!” I love it. It’s fun to wear and yes, garners me some smiles as I walk by. I don’t wear it because I want that much attention. But it’s fun to hear others talk amongst themselves: “Did you see that T-Shirt?” “That’s so cool, I gotta get one!” It’s just a lot of fun.
Since we finished off winter break by another trip to The Happiest Place on Earth, I wore my “Awesome!” T-Shirt. And was impressed at the attention it gathered. More than the usual. I actually had people come up to me and start talking. It was, again, fun. I like talking to people. I like smiling and getting to know people. I like having fun. And that’s when it hit me: When I bought a juice and the cashier asked, “How many people have called you ‘Awesome’ today?” I said, “Not enough!” And I knew then and there that it had to be my third word. Awesome is exactly what I’m striving for in the year 2012.
Picking just three words to set for a yearly standard is no easy task. The fruits of your life will be different than mine. But whichever words you choose for 2012, be sure you Dare to be an Awesome Orange in life.
And Frankly, My Dear… that’s all she wrote!
Jan 6, 2012 |
It’s 11:30 p.m. Thursday night, and I’m exhausted. I have a full day in front of me tomorrow. I just don’t have the brain power or the physical energy to put forth an astonishing post for Friday morning.
So in lieu of a decent post, here’s my Post To-Do List (those great little articles you get to look forward to reading about!):
*My decision regarding self-publication and what it might mean to me and my writing partner
*Why the freeways of Southern California are completely against me
*Three Little Words (they’re not “I Love You”)
*My Day at Disneyland: January, 2012
*Learning to Trust in Trust
*Ruben Casserole Recipe from my Mom
And whatever else I can come up with. So have a wonderful day. I’m off to a wonderful sleep.
And Frankly, My Dear… that’s all she wrote!
And Frankly, My Dear… that’s all she wrote!
