You know me, right? You know when I usually put up a title it has a different or double meaning. So when you read “bad credit” I’m sure you’re thinking, She can’t really mean ‘bad credit’. It must be some trick word usage like ‘bad’ as in ‘sick’ or ‘awesome’ and ‘credit’ like those things that roll at the end of a movie. That’s it. This Girl saw an awesome movie and she’s gonna tell us all about it.
So, while that’s a fantastic interpretation of how my mind works at times, and maybe in the future I’ll use it as such, this post really is about just that: bad credit.
Here’s the not-so-secret secret. I have struggled with debt and bad credit for the better part of the last twenty-five years. Why am I telling you this? Because I recently discovered something awesome:
I am not alone.
For a really long time ~ and by really, I mean really ~ I felt like I was. And it wasn’t until I started to share my story with people outside my family that the fog of shame and self-imposed stigma started to lift.
I felt ugly. I was having screaming matches with the people who love me and who have, for the better part of these years, helped me in some form or another. My self-worth tanked every time the phone identified “Call from Unavailable.” I was jealous when Facebook told me how others ate out and went to movies. Here I was trying to decide between cat food, a gallon of milk, or a little more gas in the car.
Sure, things weren’t always horrific. I had good seasons that included Disneyland passes, trips to the bookstore, and last year’s writing conferences. Every payday I allowed myself a McDonald’s meal and a Starbucks. But those sparkling gems were few and far between.
Most of the time, I was waking up with anxiety. I’m not saying I grew anxious as the day went on. I’m saying, I woke up that way. I would go through bouts of not being able to drink coffee or eat breakfast because my stomach was in tumbles. I unplugged the phone at home just to get some peace and quiet. I was feeling sick, tired, worn out.
I WAS DONE.
There has to be a way out, right? Or was I destined to always feel like this? Do I attract debt? The answer is yes. And no. There were quite a few circumstances out of my control that contributed to my building debt. And there are habits that keep me there.
Unemployment, medical bills from several ~ and by several, I mean twelve ~ car accidents (never my fault, thank you for your concern), and the loss of child support when Dot turned eighteen. All these led steadily to the demise of what I like to call, my free money.
As much as I tightened the belt, I was just in over my head, upside down, sideways, and very, very shaken.
The triggering event was a radio commercial for debt relief. I was amazed at how they knew just what my situation was and how a quick loan would help me immediately.
Is This Thing On?
For about eight seconds I thought of calling. Then I jumped off that horse and put the phone down.
I mean, can you imagine what the interest rate must be on a quick loan with no credit check? [Hint: Way more than I could ever pay back.] And if there’s no credit check, what do they use for collateral? Employment verification, I think. Maybe a vehicle. Well, I certainly wouldn’t want them calling my boss if I was ten minutes late on a payment. Or taking my awesome little putt-putt away. Let’s face it: I’m already late on payments. Shifting debt from one source to another doesn’t alleviate the problem. It just shifts it. That’s why this commercial got my attention.
And then something else got my attention. The realization that I wasn’t the only one who had heard that commercial. I don’t live in a metropolis, and a lot of people don’t listen to the radio. But even so, if just a fraction of the population heard that commercial and thought of calling, how many others must feel there’s no way out from under the debt storm?
You know the old saying. When it rains, it pours. We usually say that when negative things happen. Wouldn’t it be awesome if we could pay attention to the storm of sunshine when it comes? What if, instead of hiding under dark umbrellas, they were fun, bright little things sticking out of our drinks in paradise? Or, turned upside down, and we could use them to collect pennies from heaven?
Every time it rains, it rains pennies from Heaven.
My plan is to share with you in future posts how I am overcoming my debt. I’ll be transparent about what works and doesn’t work for me. No, you don’t get to see my financials. That part is none of your business, but thanks for asking.
I’m also not a debt collector, licensed life coach, credit counselor or financial adviser. So here’s the disclaimer part: Any post relating to getting out of debt or managing money is strictly my personal experience and observances. I share them to let others know
YOU ARE NOT ALONE.
I share them to give hope. There’s power in the knowledge that even though it looks like things are getting darker, there’s always some form of light.
There’s still a lighthouse.
Here’s the thing: It does get better. I promise. You can learn different habits, discover hidden treasures, use what you didn’t know were assets.
The Unemployment Cookbook is the blessed result of needing to feed my small family with a small amount of groceries. Little did I know at the time I started creating these changeable recipes that it would start me on the road to self-publishing and turn into a constant seller.
The Unemployment Cookbook, Second Edition
I hope you start to count the sunrises each day, and find lots of pennies on your journey to paying down your debt.
I didn’t mean for this post to be just a teaser, but it’s already pretty long so the next part will have to wait.
I’d love to read comments and questions from you:
Are you struggling with debt?
Do you have any advice that can help others?
What are your thoughts on money?
And if you feel that your debt is going to swallow you whole, if it is consuming the lifeblood from you, please please please talk to someone. It’s okay to be in debt. Nearly everyone is, one way or another. It’s how you treat it, how you take care of it, that matters.
But know this:
Not being able to pay your debts does not make you a failure. It takes a hundred pennies to make a dollar. Start slow. Don’t expect miracles. Your debt didn’t happen overnight. Neither will the solution. Stay the course. And fill that jar.
My Penny Jar
You’ll get there.
Finally, because I thing the world needs more upside down umbrellas and happy songs, I leave you with some snazzy tap dancing. Enjoy.
In my job as an insurance agent, I talk to a lot of clients about their homes and yards. As you know, I’m always on the lookout for how to beautify my desert dirt lot. I have great tips on how (and what) to garden. I love hearing and seeing the different creatures Mother Nature nurtures.
Lately I’ve seen more butterflies. Who can forget this beautiful Hummingbird Moth I discovered at Lowe’s?
Hummingbird Moth
Or cute, tiny Fred?
A Lizard in the Hand
Two days ago I drove over to Mom’s for our morning coffee together. There was a rock in the driveway so I avoided it and any potential damage it might cause to my tires. As I exited Ursula (as I’ve affectionately named my car), Mom called me over with a twinge of excitement. “I want to show you something.”
She was watering her flowers and I thought perhaps a new butterfly or petals. Instead, she pointed to the rock and it was then I discovered it was no rock at all, but a stunning green and yellow Scarab beetle!
Scarab Beetle
Scarab in the Shade
Over an inch in length and content to be my model for the next five minutes, it reflected the peeking sun and dulled with the clouds. It’s a sight we’ve not seen in the desert. As I do with all things, I quickly named it. “Lucky”. For he (she? it?) is a wondrous shade of green highlighted with yellow undertones. It was impossible for me to not fall in love with this unique and magnificent creature.
The Scarab is an ancient Egyptian symbol of luck and wealth. It’s not lost on me that this Scarab should also be the color of money. And emeralds. And jade. All of which are considered lucky. All of which, coincidentally, are some of my favorite things in life.
Going beyond myth and legend, I have always been attracted to shades of green. I find them refreshing, soothing, invigorating, and energizing. My Narnia-inspired media room (or, Spar Oom, as it’s also known) is painted a peaceful Mountain Sage color.
The photos above don’t do it justice.
Shiny Scarab (the best photo!)
Look at the intricate detail of his glorious hard wings, large eyes, and all those legs and tendrils! Had I not needed my coffee and then to scoot off to work, I would have stayed for hours watching him. Just watching him as he watched me.
He must have known I had other things to soon steal my attentions, for he began to wander away. But not before I captured a short video of his journey.
Here’s the original video I captured:
But he must really be lucky. Because I decided to try my hand at video editing and after just a few hours, have something Lucky would be proud of. It’s rough, I’ll admit. I’m not a professional. And I don’t fully know what I’m doing yet. But I’m getting there. And Lucky? Well, he’s getting there, too… wherever “there” is for a green and yellow Scarab beetle.
My birthday is coming up soon. Tuesday to be exact. You’re wishing me a Happy Birthday right now, aren’t you? Sure you are, I can tell. Thank you!
It’s off to a great start. And I’m going to share some of my secrets to a successful birthday with you. How do you like them apples?
How Do You Like Them Apples?!
Let’s face it: Birthday is a bit of a misnomer. What we all really like is a Birthmonth. Am I right? Y’all don’t wake up on midnight of your special day and say, “Wow. Today’s my birthday.” And then 24 hours later think, “I did not see that coming.” Not at all. If you’re an inkling at all like me or my daughter, you start thinking about it a wee bit in advance.
There’s some planning involved. Some surprises. Mostly, just some great go-with-the-flow adventuring.
It starts with a small time investment and some printer ink. Visit your favorite restaurant sites online and see if they have any eClub offers. Many will give you either a completely free or free-with-purchase coupon just for signing up. You might also get a second coupon to be used during the month of your birthday. Just a few of my favorites are Del Taco, Carino’s and Panera Bread.
On Friday, Dot visited me at work during lunch time. We went to the local Del Taco and got two free chicken soft tacos. I have a second coupon to use next week, good for one free premium shake. No purchase necessary on either coupon. I did, however, indulge in a small fries. $1.72 is a nice price for lunch, don’tcha think?
Saturday morning we woke up early. I had a $5 reward certificate from Best Buy that expires in three days. Lucky for me, they have a good selection of cheap CDs. Unlucky for me, they were one penny short of what I needed to spend in order to use the certificate. So I had to add to my purchase. What on earth does This Girl find at Best Buy? A pack of pens, of course! Oh, darn. (You can hear the sarcasm, right? Okay. Just checking.)
Then we crossed the street to enjoy a behind-the-scenes Grand Opening of our new Macy’s store. Trust me, we need this store here in the desert. Just the right touch of snobbery to get people out of their jeans and flip-flops. Yeah. This is a good thing. A better thing? Coupons! Macy’s doesn’t open to the public until Wednesday, but many charity organizations in the area sold $5 tickets. All proceeds were kept by the charities. A ticket was three-part: The first got you in the door, the second got you an entry for a $500 gift card drawing (No. We didn’t win. But thank you for asking.), and the last got you discounts at checkout.
For the regular price of one piece of clothing, I picked up a nice blouse for myself, and two tops for Dot.
Dot’s Tops
It’s like my top paid for itself. Happy Birthday to Me. Guess what I’m wearing on Tuesday!
The crowds were excessive, of course, and standing in line was nearly like doing so on Black Friday. But we managed. We also built up an appetite so I took Mutti and Dot to Carino’s where I had a St. Patrick’s Weekend coupon: wear green and get a free pizza.
Pizza for St. Patrick
They start each table with free bread and dipping oil. We ordered a plate of fried Mozzarella and beverages. They even threw in a free chocolate cake and ice cream for dessert!
Are they awesome or what? It was so much food, we took some home. Not bad for $25, including tip.
Then we decided a movie was the ticket! Dot treated us to LINCOLN at the dollar theater. We were so stuffed from lunch that it didn’t even cross our mind to get popcorn or a soda. But if it had, we belong to the theater’s Rewards club so every time we go, we get free snacks with purchase.
After the movies, I decided since we were so close, I needed to use my Staples certificates. Do you have a Staples office supply store near you? Did you know they pay you for turning in your empty ink cartridges and buying product at their store? It’s awesome. I tend to save up my cartridges and turn them in only once or twice a year so I get all my rewards at once instead of little by little. For Saturday’s indulgence, I used my certificate to buy a colorful insulated lunch tote. I treated myself to an insulated tumbler. Less than $8.00. I’m okay with the cost. It’ll last. And who doesn’t love drinking out of a fun cup?
By this time, it had been about four hours since we last ate. Panera Bread was calling our name. Let me check… yup. There’s a coupon for that. Just for signing up, I got a free pastry. Pastry? More like a meal! I’m not selfish. I bought Dot a blueberry bagel. Mom wanted to get her own, so I let her. We both spent just over $2.00.
Cinnamon Roll from Panera Bread
But what’s a pastry without a drink? Oh, look! Just down the street is a Juice It Up! and I happen to have a BOGO. That’s “Buy-One-Get-One” in Couponeze. These are a little pricey, but so worth it. $5.49 gave Dot her large Seabreeze Squeeze and I picked up a free Pineapple Punch.
Juice It Up! BOGO
Then we went home to enjoy our day’s spoils and watch Celtic Thunder on DVD. Hey, it’s a weekend full o’ the Irish, y’know? And seriously. Who doesn’t love some mighty fine singing (I’m also partial to the good looking men in suits…. Oh, Man Store, please deliver!).
That ends the day, but not the celebration! In my bag, I still have coupons for free, no-strings-attached:
Rooty Tooty Fresh n’ Fruity Breakfasts from IHOP (two coupons: one for joining, one for the month of my birthday).
One free burger (up to $10 value) from Red Robin. [Shout out to Penny for telling me about this!]
Two free desserts from Carrow’s. One for joining, one for my birthday.
I’ve had a Starbuck’s Gold Rewards for a few years (this doesn’t surprise you, does it?). On my birthday, I’ll get a free drink. Any drink or food item. Now that’s golden!
I’ve also heard that I just need to show my ID at Jack in the Box for a free Chocolate Cake or New York Style Cheesecake. The tough part will be deciding which one to choose.
Aside from all this great food, I’m especially excited to be a member of OSH (Orchard Supply Hardware). I actually love to spend my lunches there (that’s another post altogether). They gifted me a $5 certificate for my birthday, and $10 off any $30 purchase for taking a short survey. That’s going to be $35 worth of gardening beauty for only $20. I’m thinking a windchime and a birdhouse. Or a tree to transplant. Or a few potted herbs. Or flowers. Or cacti. Or a yard flag. Or… whatever else I can find for that amount.
I love these coupons not just for saving money. Let’s face it, y’all know I’m not the richest woman on the block. So saving money goes without saying. But I also love these coupons for two more reasons. The first is, they give me the opportunity to spend quality time with my family. We couldn’t have afforded a $40 pizza lunch. But $20 plus tip? Not a problem. And I’m not going to eat a Rooty Tooty alone. Nope. I can share the bill with Dot and Mutti on that. A simple breakfast for each of us. A cup of coffee. Nothing fancy. But definitely fulfilling. And OSH? That’s the second reason I love coupons. They offer possibility. Promise. Planning. All of the above.
If couponing makes me look like someone who’s counting her pennies… Well, guess what. I’m all in.
I originally posted this last week but am thrilled to announce that right now it’s being featured at BlogHer.com. You can check it out on their website by clicking here.
Rita Arens, one of the Money Editors on BlogHer.com, has been extremely helpful and communicative. I must say, this is not what I expected. I honestly expected BlogHer to be a website where contributors posted our own links and hoped with fingers crossed that some other blogger might find our post interesting enough to leave a comment.
I didn’t really expect to be featured so soon, and I didn’t expect the response to being featured. In the first two hours, the BlogHer post has received over 600 readers, been shared on twitter and facebook, and, yes, commented on.
Some of you saw the post title and are already nodding in agreement. And that’s exactly why I don’t care. Because you already know who I’m talking about. Because the world is so much more important than the Kardashians and their money-making publicity.
I think mainstream media does us a huge disservice by placing such stories in the “News” category. Since when is how high-maintenance a person is, news? Since when is someone’s paycheck (or lack there of), high priority knowledge for me and my family?
I want news to be news: What is the government doing to protect and serve us? What natural disasters are occurring worldwide? How are people helping other people?
I really don’t want, or need, sordid details of someone’s sex life. I could care less what people do in the privacy of their own home as long as it’s not illegal or immoral.
Yes, there are things we need to know about. So later, we’re not blindsided and say, “Where the heck did that come from?” Yes, it’s important to keep an eye on Politicians, the economy, and headliners.
But our current societal climate is making the economy the Celebrity. There are no great performers, no great actors or singers or athletes. It’s no longer about someone’s talent or offerings or goodwill. Now it’s just about their paycheck. And the bigger their money bags, the bigger their attraction.
Kim Kardashian can afford to be beautiful. She can afford to have her name in print every time I pick up a paper or glance through a magazine.
But where’s the news? While reporters and paparazzi are busy making Stars out of those who have money, the real stories are getting ignored and even pushed aside.
It’s almost Thanksgiving. It’s certainly the season to appreciate what you have, even if it’s not much. It’s the season to go beyond yourself and what image you want to project into the world; and instead reach out to those less fortunate, in need, and desperate.
The only thing I see Kim K. being desperate about is making headlines. And that just makes me sad.
I keep a photo on my fridge, but it’s not of her. It’s not of any celebrity. It’s of the first Thanksgiving dinner I had in my first apartment. My table was overwhelmed with turkey, mashed potatoes, gravy, stuffing, green bean casserole, dinner rolls, sparkling apple cider, and pumpkin pie. That entire meal personally cost me 76 cents.
Why? Because I was blessed by people who wanted to contribute to my first “Big Holiday Meal”. Because I knew how to coupon shop. Because I bought a candle that cost 76 cents, with tax!
I keep the photo up year round to remind me that even when I don’t think I have much, I have far more than I need. I guess I’m more like Kim that I thought.
I wonder if I could get a sponsor to pay me just for being me? Maybe my family and I could be the official spokesmodels for Target or Wal*Mart….
Tweet this: Not being able to pay your debts does not make you a failure. #badcredit #credit #debt #countyourpennies @realmojo68
