Jul 2, 2017 |
by Molly Jo Realy @RealMojo68
Frankly, On Faith.
This world isn’t actually “one size fits all.” Heck, it’s not even “one size fits most.” In my family alone, you’ll find a bride, a widow, a grandma, two brothers, two daughters, four felines, and all the extensions that come with them. We are tall, short, skinny, not-so-skinny, loud, quiet, extroverted and introverted.
You’ve heard it said, “When God made you, He broke the mold.” I say, there was no mold to begin with. He didn’t use some manufacturing plant or a cookie cutter to make you. He took you in His own hands and formed you with His careful touch. He applied every dimple, smoothed every hair. He gave you the desires of your heart.
You made all the delicate, inner parts of my body
and knit me together in my mother’s womb.
~Psalm 139:13, NLT
He not only designed you uniquely, He filled you uniquely. Your gifts, talents, reactions, emotions, thought processes . . . Everything inside you. They are all uniquely you.
In his grace, God has given us different gifts for doing certain things well. So if God has given you the ability to prophesy, speak out with as much faith as God has given you. If your gift is serving others, serve them well. If you are a teacher, teach well. If your gift is to encourage others, be encouraging. If it is giving, give generously. If God has given you leadership ability, take the responsibility seriously. And if you have a gift for showing kindness to others, do it gladly.
~Romans 12:6-8, NLT
Do you hear that? He gifted you, so you can gift yourself to the world.
Believe in yourself. He already does.
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Frankly, On Faith: You are unique.
And Frankly, My Dear . . . That’s all she wrote!
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Nov 18, 2015 |
by Molly Jo Realy @MollyJoRealy
Let’s be real clear about something: Medical depression is a chemical imbalance, it’s a body malfunction that makes it hard to function. The same way a broken thumb makes it hard to hold a mug without a handle. You learn other ways of managing, and you know that some day the thumb will heal. It may not always work perfectly, but it will work. And if it doesn’t, you learn other ways of managing, of holding your mug.
People who suffer from depression are not weak in faith. It’s not a spiritual deficiency. Sometimes holding on to that mug takes all the strength a person has, but at least they’re holding on.
So stop telling them they’re doing it wrong.
If your thumbs are working, if every atom in your body and brain are working at full capacity, congratulations. Your name is Jesus.
Guess what. My name’s not that.
My thumb may be broken, but the rest of me works just fine.
I see a lot of memes about “share this if you know someone who suffers . . .” but we don’t, do we? We don’t “share” because we don’t want to be associated with “that”. We glance, nod, think of someone else, think “there but for the grace of God go I.”
We think, “If only they did this, tried that, went here, skipped there . . .”
We make our own judgment calls of how their life could be, should be, better.
We hide, we’re embarrassed. We think we’re less than perfect because it comes down to “us” and “them”, where “us” are the “normal” people and “them” are the ones who suffer.
We/Us avoid getting too deep with we/them. We/us are uncomfortable, can’t comprehend how this thumb doesn’t work, we/us don’t really want to know how the thumb broke to begin with, we/us offer solutions. The problem is, we/them can’t always pick up your solution. Sometimes, we/them are so used to the broken thumb, that we/them sometimes don’t remember it will heal. We know how to compensate and make do. We don’t always know how we broke it. We sometimes feel it’s always been broken, or we forget it’s broken. We think this is the way it’s always been. But it isn’t. We just don’t always remember “normal”.
We/us can’t understand why we/them just can’t “get it together”. We think they aren’t strong enough, they must want this, or not want God. We think there’s a disconnect between their body and their soul and they don’t want to mend it.
We/them can’t express ourselves. We/them know we ask too much, and we/them put we/us in ridiculous positions where we/us have to say no which perpetuates our/their sense of alienation.
We/them feel combative, defensive . . . and always alone.
We just want to be invited back to the normal table.
Sometimes the problem isn’t we/them. Sometimes a thumb break is the kindest thing that can happen to us/them because it’s at that point that there’s a conscious realization that something’s not right.
Sometimes the best help we/us can give us/them is to not to splint the thumb, but just ask, “Can I hold that mug for you, for a little while? Can I stay here and watch you try, and learn how you cope so I can see more of how you are? Can I be with you, in case you start to drop your mug and I can help? Can I be normal around you and not make you feel less normal? Can I do that for you? Will you let me?”
And we/them will say, “No. It’s awkward. I’m embarrassed. I’m supposed to be strong. I’m supposed to have my own thumb back right away. It shouldn’t take this long to heal. I should know how to do this by now. It’s my thumb that’s broken, not yours. You shouldn’t be here for this. Go away. Go away. Go away!”
That’s when we/them need we/us to say, “Yeah. I’m gonna be your thumb for a while. I’m gonna be your normal.”
That’s when we/them need we/us to stay. No matter what.
That’s when we/them will drop the mug, push we/us away, say things we/them don’t mean, do things we/them shouldn’t do.
That’s when we/them need we/us to stay. NO MATTER WHAT.
And sometimes say nothing.
But just stay.
And when we have our thumbs back, we/them still don’t want you/us to leave. Because it can be really scary to admit we were broken, but that’s when you were there. So it’s also hard to admit while we want our thumbs back, we’re afraid you’re going to leave. Because some people like us when we’re broken. It’s the only time they hear us. So sometimes, we stay a little more broken, a little longer, so we don’t have to be alone.
And then we know. We don’t like being broken. Not really.
We just want to be back at the normal table with our normal people and forget there was a time we weren’t normal.
You don’t understand. And that’s okay.
Our normal isn’t your normal and it may never be.
We don’t want to be unique. We can’t help it.
We’re different. We’re not always broken.
It’s our faith that things will get better that keeps us holding that mug.
Depression isn’t a spiritual deficiency. It’s just a struggle.
Without faith, I wouldn’t be here to tell you these things.
Without faith, I wouldn’t believe it will get better.
Depression isn’t a spiritual deficiency. And it doesn’t define me.
Like a thumb, it’s just a small part of my body.
Some days it’s more useful than others.
It won’t always be broken.
I won’t always be broken.
You won’t always be broken.
Have faith in that.
Depression is not a spiritual deficiency.
And Frankly, My Dear . . . that’s all she wrote!
May 18, 2012 |
[This post is one of my Ten Bible Verses I Try to Live By]
I recently completed my list of Ten Bible Verses I Try to Live By. The first on that list is what I consider to be my “life verse”: the one I cling to and claim as God’s word spoken directly to me.
Jeremiah 29:11 (NIV)
“For I know the plans I have for you,”
declares the LORD.
“Plans to prosper you, and not to harm you.
Plans to give you hope and a future.”
Many years ago, when I was uncertain and very afraid of life, in the course of one week three people came up to me and said, “God wants you to know…” and spoke this verse to me. Sure, you say. It’s a common, popular verse when friends see you struggling and want to give you something to hold on to. That may be… except two of these three people had never met me.
One was a good friend. One was the mother of an acquaintance. And one was a stranger at church.
Needless to say, God got my attention. And I listened. And continue to do so to this day. Because He has never failed me.
Recently I found myself focusing on the verse in a different way. For a while I’ve been reciting it as a memory verse, calling out words like “hope” and “prosper” without much deep consideration. I felt God calling me to go deeper, and to tell you about it.
The verse itself is comprised of 29 words. Which makes it easier to remember that the verse is 29:11.
Word by word, I dissected the verse. I came up with a list of what it Is, and compared it with a list of what it Is Not.
Jeremiah 29:11
If we were to pay attention to how the enemy wants us to see ourselves in God’s design, he might try to tell us something else; something like this:
“Because some random stranger had a general idea that never included you,” whispers satan and the world at large, “Maybe you should think about choosing between your meager existence and what to do about it. You can’t make it any better. You’ll never be able to earn your position or any rewards. You’re not good enough. You’ve been forgotten and discarded, and there is no hope for you at all.”
But the TRUTH about what God is saying to you is this:
“Hey, YOU! Pay attention! The Almighty Abba, Your Daddy-God, is absolutely sure and confident about the detailed, specific blueprints He has designed for YOU! The Almighty Abba has publicly announced this Declaration in His Kingdom. He has directed His resources in YOUR favor, including guards to stop YOU from being attacked and wounded. He has also decreed that YOU be gifted with giddy anticipation as you wait for even better things to come and accompany YOU for ALL your upcoming days!”
I don’t know about you, but I choose to believe my Dad, not some liar. After all, Father Knows Best. Right?
And Frankly, My Dear… that’s all she wrote!
