Jan 19, 2015 |
A few days ago I did something I wasn’t sure I could do, for a variety of reasons: I registered to attend the Orange County Christian Writers Conference in April.
My friend and writing mentor, Aaron Gansky, is a featured speaker and while I always value the information he gives, there are several other sessions I’m looking forward to being a part of.
This will be the second writers conference I’ve attended. Ever. This one is different from the first one I attended last November. That one was local, and there were three consecutive sessions in the same auditorium. I knew almost everyone, because it was sponsored by my Writers Club. This one requires a little drive time, there are many short sessions to choose from, and aside from Aaron and hopefully my friend Beckie, I won’t know anyone.
Molly and Beckie
Thankfully, it was easy to choose my sessions based on my experience as a writer, and my needs to grow my network. I’m choosing to focus on what will help me finish NOLA and market it as well.
And now that the fun stuff has been announced, let’s get real.
It’s intimidating to register for a writers conference. At least, it is for me. I have so many unknowns.
- What if I’m not a good enough writer to be there?
- What if I can’t focus and forget all the information?
- What if everyone else really has a game plan for their writing, and laugh because I don’t?
- What if I share my idea for my novels and learn they’re not that great?
- What if the weather is bad for the drive?
- What if it’s like high school and people are clique-ish and I’m left out?
- What if I get star-struck and instead of being intelligent I stumble and mumble my way through meetings and greetings?
- What if I spill coffee on myself and don’t bring an extra sweater to cover it up?
These are all real concerns I have.
But the one I didn’t know I had, came to light after I registered. I have been nagged with the internal question
What if I’m not good enough?
That is, not that I’m not a good enough writer. I believe I’m a good writer on my way to being a great writer.
But, what if I’m not a good enough person? What makes it okay for someone like me to attend a Christian writers conference?
Sure, I write a lot about God and trusting His plan for our lives. I live a Faith-based life. But I’m no Saint. I’m no hero. And on not-so-good days, I can be downright bad and ugly. So what makes it okay for me to attend a Christian writers conference?
The same thing that makes it okay for me to be a writer. I don’t know everything. But what I do know, I can share. I’m not Chef Bobby Flay, but I like to cook, so I share recipes. I’m not a veterinarian, but I can write about my cats. I don’t own a landscape company or live in a mansion, but I can still blog about how to keep a nice house with decorating and fix-it tips.
So what makes it okay for me to attend a Christian writers conference? I had to wrap my head around it. I would have no problem supporting anyone else who wants to go, and if they voiced these same concerns, I’d tell them
Stop. Listen to yourself. No. Don’t. Listen to God. He brought you here for a reason. You know He did. And He has a plan for you, for your writing. Nobody’s perfect and I’m not asking you be. Did you screw up something yesterday? I did, too. I always do. It’s human nature. But you know what? God forgives you. He forgave you, and He keeps forgiving you. So get out of the dark hole you created, see the Sonshine, and do what He’s calling you to do. Be a writer. You don’t have to prosthelytize all the time. It’s okay to write mysteries and fantasy. Just write. Just use the talents He gave you, and do it! Get to the conference. Meet other imperfect people who will help you hone your imperfections into great storytelling. It’s okay. It’s all going to be okay.
That’s what I would tell someone else. So that’s what I’m telling me. I’m not perfect, and I’m not a Bible thumper. But I am a Christian.
So I’m giving myself permission to attend a Christian writers conference.
Now here’s the neat part. Once I decided to go (after a few nudges from Beckie and Aaron), my first thought was “I can’t afford this.” Beckie and I looked at the registration schedule. We can’t go Friday night, so we would just carpool together for the Saturday sessions. It’s $135 for the day. There’s a 10% discount code available, so my cost would drop to $121.50. Not too bad when you consider everything that’s included. But it’s still more than what I want to shell out right now, especially since I’m intent on getting to Blue Ridge Mountains Christian Writers Conference in North Carolina in May.
Feeling somewhat apprehensive and pre-defeated, I asked them to pray with me for direction on this. That was Saturday night.
On Tuesday morning, I received a phone message from my insurance company. They finally received full restitution from the at-fault party for an accident I was in nearly five years ago. At that time, my insurance company took care of my vehicle replacement, my medical bills, and my settlement. But because I had to go through my own policy, I wasn’t able to collect my $500 deductible. Two years later, they received a large, albeit incomplete sum, and mailed me a check for a partial amount.
As of last week, they received the final payment, and issued me a payment for the balance of my deductible.
The conference would cost me $121.50.
The insurance payment is $121.43.
How on earth am I going to find seven pennies? I’m pretty sure God is asking me to trust Him.
And that’s how I know it’s okay for me to attend a Christian writers conference.
My Life Verse ~ Jeremiah 29:11
And Frankly, my dear . . . that’s all she wrote!
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More or Less: 29 Words
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My Amazon Author’s Page
Aug 8, 2014 |
Five Things Friday at Frankly, My Dear…
The calendar tells me it’s been nearly two months since I last blogged.
Inconceivable!
Without going into dramatic detail, suffice to say life with all its twists and turns has been a great distraction from blogging. It’s been full of The Good, The Bad, and The Ugly. And we’re all learning to exchange beauty for ashes (Isaiah 61:3).
The calendar also tells me the year is about two-thirds behind us. Now that’s crazy! I look back on my resolutions and I’m so happy I had just one.
BETTER! 2014
I’m proud to say I’ve continued to do what I can to make life Better for those around me, and yes, for myself. I’m not proud to say I’ve put blogging on one of the back burners. It’s one of those things that I have great aspirations for, yet lately seem to not have time. So today, I’m taking time. I’m making time. I’m blogging. And I feel better because of it.
This week’s Five Things Friday theme is Start/Stop. It’s about those things in life that we either need to step up to, or let go of, or find a happy medium to make them better.
Here’s my Five.
1. NOLA. Is that really such a surprise? I hit a very tall Writer’s Block wall over two weeks ago. Thankfully, my writing mentor, Aaron Gansky, talked me through it. Based on feedback from Aaron, The Wordsmiths (the critique group I belong to), and several other beta readers, I’m going back to the beginning. Just the beginning. The plot itself will remain nearly the same, with just a few more twists and turns than I originally mentioned. But I need a better diving board, so I’m rewriting what I have and moving on from there. [Thank you, Aaron, for pointing out that my murder mystery novel has yet to include a murder.]
The Wordsmiths Critique Group
2. My budget. I had a long talk with God about my finances and to be honest, I didn’t like what He had to say. Because He said “Trust me.” It’s scary to trust a God I can’t physically see, for money that I physically need. I’m learning to be still, to not force anything, and to communicate. I stopped going from paycheck to paycheck, and started to really use my Mead OrganizeHer Expense Tracker. No, I’m not trying to be a commercial for them. But if you were to ask me a year ago how I keep track, I wouldn’t have a clue. Now, as soon as a bill comes in, I put it in the Bills pocket. Each month has an expense list, suggestions, and blanks for me to include my own. I’m learning to call my creditors before the due date if I can’t make the full payment. And you know what? They work with me. I’m no longer afraid of my finances. And that’s a good start. I’m still praying for a way to cut down my Sycamore tree, as it’s leaching into my watering system and I found out I’m highly allergic to it. And Beckie and I are hoping to attend next year’s Blue Ridge Mountains Christian Writer’s Conference in May. There’s a huge correlation between my prayer life and peace about my finances.
3. Who’s Beckie? She’s the Newest member of The New Inklings, the writer’s group I formed around my company, New Inklings Press. Beckie and I know each other nine ways ’til Sunday and are just now realizing how many connections we have. I met her over a year ago while promoting The Unemployment Cookbook, and she recently reached out to me for a writer’s get-together. She’s been published in magazines, completed the Institute of Children’s Literature (ICL), and inspires me to keep going when I want to quit. Because of her, I’m going to start the next lessons at ICL and finally complete the course I signed up and paid for so long ago.
4. Complicated. In May/June, I was thrilled to have met up with an old friend and we had the idea to pursue a relationship. The relationship aspect didn’t work out, but I learned a valuable lesson through it: Don’t Leave. Period. While our romantic intentions didn’t flourish, I learned better communication skills. I prefer writing, of course. He prefers speaking. Long texts and longer phone calls were the norm between us. And no matter that any long-term romance was never a really good idea between us, the friendship has remained. As has my determination to not walk away from the fundamentally most important parts of life. He and I haven’t left each other, we just left behind an improbable romance. And I’m okay with that. Because, fundamentally, he’s still here for me. And I’m still here for him. No matter what.
Don’t Leave. Period.
5. Social. At the beginning of this post, I alluded to some, shall we say, challenges in the past few months that have sapped my attentions and my strengths. Because of this, I’ve had to evaluate my social calendar and make some changes. I momentarily stepped down as Social Media Manager (SMM) for my writer’s club. Aaron hired me as his SMM for a reciprocal mentoring agreement. I’ve taken as much off my plate as I can, and I’m still paring down. I’m learning to fit dinner and socializing into the same event. I’m learning to say “no” instead of “let me try”. I’m learning to rest. I’m learning what and who the important socials are. And I’m learning to let go. It’s not my favorite thing. But it’s important.
5b. [BONUS] Social. Aaron is teaching me how to nerd it by playing Magic: The Gathering. Stay tuned for his guest post on the subject. I enjoy the complexity of strategy, the lottery-feel of opening a new pack to search for random “rares”, and that while he’s always winning at Magic, he’s also mentoring me on my writing. It’s a win-win-win situation, in my book.
5c. [DOUBLE BONUS]. Social/book. If any of you bloggers reading this are interested, Aaron is giving away five free copies of his newest book, THE BARGAIN, (either digital or audio) in exchange for a thorough/heartfelt review on your blog. Just leave a comment below and we’ll be in touch with further details.
The Bargain by Aaron D. Gansky
Well, now that I’ve started blogging again, it’s time to stop this post. It’s your turn to comment, like, link up, and otherwise share what your FIVE THINGS FRIDAY: Start/Stop items are.
And Frankly, My Dear . . . that’s all she wrote!
You may also enjoy reading:
MoJo Book Review and Giveaway: The Bargain by Aaron D. Gansky
It’s Complicated, Part One: My Relationship
FIVE THINGS FRIDAY: The Experience.
2014: BETTER.
Doing the Write Thing: Writing Conferences Fundraiser
Dec 28, 2012 |
It’s the last Friday of the month, and the year.
I’ve had my Resolutions in place for over a week now.
A writing schedule. A work schedule. A home schedule.
A food budget. A recipe budget. A home budget. An emergency budget.
I have a plan. I plan… to plan.
Since July, 2011 I sort of flew by the seat of my pants. Until I started working again.
Without child support and only 35 hours a week, my income isn’t that great. But it’s mine. And I’m doing the best I can.
I have never wanted to go on Welfare. I’m frustrated with the stigma that causes. I understand the system isn’t perfect, but nothing ever is. I don’t like the perception that “everyone” on welfare is lazy or taking advantage of others. There is no shame in finding help when it’s vital to existence. But I refuse to burden society with my debts. I’ve always managed to pay my bills… late, past due, those fees add up. But at least I’m the one paying them. And someday soon, it will get better.
We’re going to tighten the belt even more around here. Now that the holiday specials are over, I’m suspending my TV subscription for a few months. That money will go toward paying off the smallest bill in January. So in February, I can take the TV money and the smallest bill money, and put that toward the next smallest bill. After another month, that’s two bills paid off.
If the Fiscal Cliff isn’t as horrid as we’re being scared into thinking, my tax refund should help pay off a few more small debts.
My goal, God willing and the Creek Don’t Rise, is to be nearly debt-free by the end of 2013. The only remaining debts should by my mortgage, car, and student loans.
That’s the plan.
I don’t know how realistic it is. If anything changes, I don’t know how I’ll handle it.
I received four books for Christmas. Dot gave me a wonderful edition of JRR Tolkien’s The Hobbit. It includes maps, has a leather cover, and is pocket size. It’s perfect! The other three are from my brother. Three books on better blogging. There aren’t enough hours in the day for me to read! (Another reason the TV won’t be missed.)
I’m making a menu plan for January. That’s a separate post. I was gifted with a $100 gift card for Christmas, and I intend to use it strictly for my food budget. I want to see how long it will last if I plan ahead. Breakfast, lunch, dinner, and a few snacks. I’m choosing foods that will go a long way: one box of Malt-o-Meal is two weeks’ breakfast for us. My Slow Cooker Ratatouille will feed us for days as a hot dish, pizza topping, and in my Baked Frittata.
I’m going to cut out fast food eating, too. That means no Starbucks in January, and I can’t begin to tell you how I feel about that. I’m only six drinks shy of keeping my Gold Card Status, too. Well, my tastebuds won’t thank me, but my wallet will!
And then there’s the writing. Oh, the writing! Recipes. Dragons. And everything in between. I miss posting daily links at BlogHer’s NaBloPoMo, but I don’t miss my trite, nonsensical postings. With the Cookbook Campaign, the Series with Megan, the Study on the Ten Commandments, and a few other starter projects, my writing plate is overflowing with goodies!
And today is Friday. The last Friday of the month and year. But really… it’s just the Beginning.
And Frankly, My Dear… that’s all she wrote!
Dec 7, 2012 |
When I wrote my first TGIF post, I hadn’t planned on making it a staple of this Blog. But sometimes a person just stumbles upon what works.
That first post was soul-baring. This one, notsomuch. This one, I really am just thankful.
Today I get my second paycheck. I find it ironic that my first post let you in on my life of poverty; and here it is a few weeks later and I’m praising the payday. It’s not a lot. It won’t replace the missing child support. But it’s enough. I’ll make it enough. And that’s all I need.
Sometimes I get frustrated, having just “enough”. Sometimes I’d like to be more than “ok”. But I’ll take what I can get, and give Thanks for it. I’ve been teasing my coworker when he leaves for lunch that he’s not allowed to come back unless he brings the winning Lottery ticket with him. This week, our Boss overheard and asked if it was a big jackpot this week. I laughed and said, “I have absolutely no idea.” We agreed that any extra money is more than what we have now so why not grab it?
Sometimes I feel like I’m back on that Merry-Go-Round. Going nowhere except high and low. Up and down and chasing my tail in circles.
Not this time. This time I’m reaching for the Brass Ring. And you know what? If my little pony can’t get me there, it’s time to change strides. Time to change horses. Time to do whatever it takes to be a winner.
The first step is to acknowledge there are steps. Success isn’t All-or-Nothing. It’s a journey. And it starts here. Now. With me. It starts.
That’s how I feel today. This paycheck is the start of Something Good. The planets seem to be aligning for me and Dot, and it’s been a long time coming. I have a job. My Kickstarter campaign is off to a good start. Oh, and let’s not forget it’s holiday time.
So. In the infamous words of my favorite TV show theme… I’m gonna make it after all.
Mary Tyler Moore Wanna-Be
and My Photo Bombing Dot
Indeed.
I have a lot to be thankful for today.
How ’bout you?
And Frankly, My Dear… that’s all she wrote!
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TGIF
TGIF, Part II
TGIF, Part III
You’re Gonna Make It After All
Nov 18, 2012 |
This last month has shown me so much. I’ve seen seen how to make ends meet when I didn’t think I could. I’ve learned how to cook rice in ways I didn’t know possible. I’ve managed to keep writing every day, even when I didn’t think I had anything to write about. And I’ve realized you want me to be honest.
For a few weeks, I’ve been finding that honesty. It’s led me to expose parts of my life that I hadn’t let too many see. And your outpouring has been so wonderful, so uplifting. Thank you.
Thank you.
My day job is going well. I’d forgotten more about the job than I realized. In the time I’ve been out of the industry, procedures have changed. My new office runs differently than the last. So ten days after my first day, and I’m still on the “learning curve”. My Boss is patient. Informative. Helpful.
I’m thankful.
I know my posts of late have been stricken with words like “poverty” mixed with “hope”. I’m not beating a dead horse nor riding romantically off into the sunset. Rather, I’m in between those two dynamics; I’m living life daily making choices that I intend to lead to a better 2013.
I don’t have the winning lottery ticket. No magic wand. It will take time to reach the quick goals. But it’s do-able. I can still write. Publish. Market. Earn. Work.
How wonderfully exciting the future seems to me right now. How intimidating and thrilling and workable.
Emily Dickinson said it best:
“Hope” is the thing with feathers –
That perches in the soul –
And sings the tune without the words –
And never stops – at all …
And Frankly, My Dear… that’s all she wrote!
