Sep 26, 2014 |

Five Things Friday at Frankly, My Dear…
Welcome back to Five Things Friday. My theme for this week is #DoingTheWriteThing. I can’t get tired of it. The more I promote writing, the more addicted to writing I become.
Every conversation I hear, every sight I see, every sense I experience is placed in my mental filing cabinet (and sometimes on paper) for probable later use.
Reading about writing excites me. I’m currently studying Flannery O’Connor’s “Mystery and Manners” and came across this gem, Number One on today’s Five Things Friday.

Flannery O’Connor’s “Mystery and Manners”
1. My writing mentor assigned me to read two books. Flannery O’Connor’s “Mystery and Manners” is the first. I’ve been struggling with how to write a gripping murder mystery while retaining my Christianity. He has been telling me for several months that this book would clear that up for me. Three chapters in, and I see he’s right. The book begins with an essay or two on peacocks, which has rekindled my love for these beautiful creatures. That’s another blog post. The next sections express the importance of Christians writing the grotesque with redemption. For if we write only “rainbow and unicorns” (my words) where is the challenge for others to change their world? Authenticity, not loftiness, is the better writing.
2. I finally released The Unemployment Cookbook for Kindle on Amazon. I spent quite a bit of last week rekeying the text into the proper format, then creating the hyperlinks in the Table of Contents. It’s satisfying to have another title in the stable, as well as a completed project. Novel writing takes years, so to have something to show for all my writing efforts makes me feel productive, but more than that, it gives me the chance to show you, my faithful readers, that your support isn’t in vain or cast aside.

The Unemployment Cookbook, Second Edition
3. All the profits from the Kindle cookbook are going into my #DoingTheWriteThing fundraiser. So even though I have a fundraiser page set up, I’m doing as much as I can to contribute my fair share. Each morning brings me one day closer to the Blue Ridge Mountains Christian Writers Conference and other networking and learning opportunities, and one step closer to being the better writer I know I can be.

Go Fund Me: #DoingTheWriteThing
4. I reconnected with old friends last week. My missionary friend, Cynthia, returned home from Germany for a short visit. It’s been quite a few years since we were able to see each other, and I am grateful for the time we had. I was reminded that she, too, is a creative writer. She shared how she’s using her gift to minister to children, teens, and young women near Dresden, Germany.

Three Amigas: Corrie, Cynthia, Molly Jo
5. I’m promoting the High Desert Chapter of the California Writers Club. I’ve mentioned it before. It’s a wonderful, state-recognized organization for writers to get together. With over one hundred active members, we have formal critique groups, informal salons, monthly meetings with guest speakers, book fairs, networking and sales opportunities. For the last several months I’ve been the official Social Media Marketer. That’s just a fancy way of saying I get to be on social media for the club. I sit up front at the meetings, attend local author book signings, take photos, and share content. There’s something magical about being in a room of like-minded people, those who don’t just see the words on paper, but know how to put them there. I’m very honored to be an active member of this group.

Wordsmith Salon: Dwight, Tess, Richard, Lorelei, Molly Jo
Today’s bonus is for those of you who think I can’t stop writing.

My Favorite Quote From Isaac Asimov
You’re right.
And Frankly, My Dear . . . that’s all she wrote!
You may also enjoy reading:
Five Years and a Party
FIVE THINGS FRIDAY: The Big Easy
“What’s the Word?” Wednesday: Aaron Gansky on Magic and Writing
New Meaning to Ghost Writing
I’ll Fly Away
Aug 24, 2014 |
The wind has been blowing here at Bedford Manor. At times its brought with it a cleansing rain, at others, it just stirs the dust. There’s been heat, sun, clouds, humidity, wind, and stillness. The weather just can’t make up its mind.

Rain on a Leaf
It’s symbolic of how I’ve been feeling lately ~ uncertain as to my purpose. I hit a rather large wall of writer’s block last month and it’s taken me until two days ago to chisel it down.
I’d previously set a goal to have the first (and hopefully only) draft of NOLA finished by now. I’d wanted to start marketing it for sale in October. Instead, I’m rewriting the beginning and incorporating bits and pieces of what I’ve already done.
Most writers will advocate for writing the first draft in its entirety before starting any edits. I usually agree. Except NOLA needed a change. Without changing the beginning, I couldn’t coherently string those changes through the rest of the text. So I threw my self-imposed deadline out the window and, to the cheers of my writing mentor and critique group, am focusing on quality, not quantity.
I’ve been blessed with a friendship with Ms. New Orleans 2014, Lindsay Reine. Not only is she full of information on New Orleans, she’s become my newest cheerleader.
I still have my #DoingTheWriteThing fundraiser but I’ve amped it up a little. On the advice of several friends, I began a GoFundMe campaign. I like it for a variety of reasons. There’s no deadline, no all-or-nothing criteria. And it’s incredibly easy to navigate, update, and share.
I currently have three sponsors for a total of $110.00. It may not sound like much, but it’s eleven thousand pennies more than I had a month ago!

My Penny Jar
I must be doing something right, or should I say, write. I’m thankful for each of you, all of you, who believe in what I do, and who are helping me to achieve the goals of taking one step at a time. Some steps are bigger than others, and sometimes I have to take a step back. But a trusted person once told me

One Step Forward
Being a Christian and writing a murder mystery can be dichotic but not mutually exclusive. Ted Dekker does a fine job of weaving intrigue and sinister acts into redeeming storylines. I can do the same.
So I will continue to work on NOLA, and trust you’ll understand my delay. I’d much rather present you with a take-your-breath-away piece of writing in a few months or even a year or two, than to sell something now that you wouldn’t take off the bookshelf again, or worse, recommend to a friend.
I’m back in the saddle with blogging too, but I’ve a suspicion you may already know this.
During the holidays, I hope to add a few craft and decorating ideas as well as some recipes and reviews.
In the meantime, I’ll continue to pray, work, take care of Bedford Manor, and of course, I’ll keep #DoingTheWriteThing.
And Frankly, My Dear . . . that’s all she wrote!
You may also enjoy reading:
How Bedford Manor Got Its Name
My Real Italian Kitchen: Polenta and Sauce
FIVE THINGS FRIDAY: Start/Stop
BETTER: Thanksgiving
More or Less: 29 Words
Apr 22, 2014 |
I’m afraid of my own success. What if achieving my dreams means changing everything I know about my life?
I am my own worst enemy. I love stability of structure and I’m not one to shed the security blanket easily.
But often, blank pages hold just as much accusations as they do promise.

Blank Pages are the World’s Canvas
I play the “What If” game too often because, in the past, the “What If’s” happened. The bad ones. The oh-my-God-this-could-only-happen-to-me and the I’m-one-in-a-million-and-not-in-a-good-way ones. The I’m-being-sabotaged-and-no-one-will-stand-up-for-me ones. The life-will-never-be-the-same-again ones.
And I really love stability.
So when anything comes along that can upset the apple cart, I get nervous.
I’ve had to learn to recognize my anxiety triggers. I know to avoid too much coffee on those high-adrenaline days. I have a “smart shopping” checklist on my iPhone for those necessary eat-out-but-not-fast-food days. The older I get, the better I am at listening to my body. My emotions may want chocolate ganache, but my bloodstream craves caffeine-free Gatorade.
Better sleep + better foods = better emotions.
So the anxiety doesn’t get to me like it used to. Of course, there are certain elements that are no longer around. That helps, too. You know what I’m talking about: those button-pusher people who are as good at backstabbing as they are at infiltrating. Those situations that belong on a soap opera and not in my life. I’ve been lucky to distance myself from the hurts and the hurtful. But their shadows remain.
I’ve had to retrain myself to not be afraid, the way others wanted to keep me afraid. Of sharing myself. Of living authentically. Of being the Me I’m supposed to be. Their false condemnations that who I was wasn’t good enough, would never be good enough. That I had deep, dark secrets to be spilled instead of forgiveness to be shared.
But now I know.
I’m better than that.
I’m better than what they said.
I’m better.
But I’m still afraid.
I’m still okay with the bad “What If’s”. The ones I can’t control.
But . . .
What if I am successful? What if I achieve everything I know I’m meant to do?
What if I conquer it all . . .
And I win?
The last few years were so hard. You’ve heard my poverty stories before. I know I’m not unique. I know there are many more people out there fighting just like me to save their homes and feed their families and do a thousand dollars worth of repairs on a nickel budget. People who don’t have the resources that I have, people who don’t have other people to come alongside them and cheer them on or pull them back on to the path.
And I’m not trying to complain. But my life is such a dichotomy between the dregs of the economy and the elation of my soaring words.
I don’t want to be stuck here any more. I don’t want to whine and complain and worry and cry.
But I do.
Yet, I see my way out. I see the path that I’ve laid, and I see where it’s going.
I no longer put the word “aspiring” before “writer” when I tell people what I do. I am a writer. I am a good writer. The rest of the world will soon discover how great a writer I am.

My “new” workspace ~ a real desk!
In the last two months, just eight short weeks, my writing universe has grown by leaps and bounds. I have my desk. I’ve met some wonderful people who are turning out to be great connections. I saw the need for a position with my writers club and asked to create it. [The result was a resounding yes: I’m now the official Social Media Manager for the California Writers Club, High Desert Branch, come join the fun on Facebook.] All four books are progressing fast. I might soon have The Unemployment Cookbook on local bookstore shelves. My critique group is essential to me in a craft capacity, and a fellowship.
All these are the beginnings of what I have always prayed for, always held my breath and crossed my fingers for. All these are essential to me being Me.
To be able to put food on the table and gas in the car and pay the bills on time and stop these damned collection calls and not “borrow” money that everyone knows until I win the lottery I will never be able to pay it back.
And that scares me, too. It scares me because it’s possible financial stability is on the five-year horizon. If I don’t need my family, my mommy and brothers, any more, will they still need me?
If Megan and I obtain all we’re reaching for, do I have to give up being home every night with Dot and our FurFamily?
If I don’t have to worry about tomorrow as much as I currently do, what will I do with that happiness?
I don’t want to be arrogant or a celebrity. I just want to be the best writer I can possibly be. I want to share my stories with the world. And yes, I would like to know that my stories make a difference.
And make money. Let’s be real. This is how I want to pay my bills. This is how I long to provide for my family.
For my family.

MoJo & Dot
And so I write my stories. My poems. My blogs. My thoughts and suspicions and dreams and nightmares. And I share them. And I collect them for future publication. And I keep on writing it out. Because I can’t be the only one who thinks like this, right? I can’t be the only one who feels so incomplete and so uplifted at the same time . . . right?
This is my calling. To be the best writer I know how to be. To tell the world about life in a way that can only be told by me.
But I’m not there yet. I’m still taking the journey. And at times it’s dark and twisty and scary. My heart pounds inside my chest and I can’t catch my breath.
What If I’m wrong? What If my path is a dead-end? What If those shadows are still waiting to sabotage me? What If I lose the house before I earn enough to save it? What If more bad than good happens?
Can I keep going on?
Yes.
So I let my light shine. From inside. Whatever light I have, I broadcast it.
Sometimes it’s a candle. Sometimes it’s the sun.
The end of the path will never be a reality. I’m thankful for that. With each step taken, there’s another step to take.
While I’m still here, still bringing with me the pains of the past, still glimpsing an uncertain future, I do know this: I have something to say.
And I can say it well.
I just need the rest of the world to listen.
As I sit here drafting this post, trying not to complain, trying to look for the light and not worry about tomorrow or the distractions it brings, my friend Janice posted this on her Facebook profile:
“Strength & resilience emerge by your own will to become a better person, no matter what downfalls happen in your life… be your own hero.”
Thanks, Janice. You are, as always, the right person at the right time.
How do you like them apples?!

How Do You Like Them Apples?!
“Then Jesus said to his disciples: “Therefore I tell you, do not worry about your life, what you will eat; or about your body, what you will wear. For life is more than food, and the body more than clothes.” [Luke 12:22-23, NIV]
And Frankly, My Dear . . . that’s all she wrote!
You may also enjoy reading:
Apples
Poverty: My Story
I am Defined. And I am a Mystery.
This post is linked up with Shell at Things I Can’t Say. Because sometimes, we just can’t.
Jan 8, 2014 |
I discovered something about myself a few weeks ago.
Halfway between Thanksgiving and Christmas and all that went with it, I decided to do what I haven’t done for a very long time.
I cranked up the radio and I sang along. Loudly.
It. Felt. Great.
There’s something about belting out a strong ballad or headbanging to a heavy bass that really makes me feel better. It’s soothing, aerobic, invigorating, inspirational, magical.
For me, singing is better than dancing or driving or exercise. And I love doing all those things! (Okay, not so much the exercise thingy.) It goes along with those things, sure. But singing is now second on my list of Ways to Feel Better. And isn’t this my year of being better? Of course it is!
So I’m singing my way through 2014.
When I began singing again a few weeks ago I was in my car. I used to crank it up and sing so loud! I haven’t done that in forever. I just listened. No more! I’ve decided to start participating again. To get my voice out there. Even if it’s just for me in my car or in my kitchen.
I began singing my recipes instead of just reading them. I have my alarm set to wake up to a song, not a beep.
Something wonderful happens when people sing.
The world stops. For just a moment. The world stops, and listens, and the singer smiles.
And people feel better.
There is no greater language than music.
And so today, I added a few more songs to My Soundtrack.
- Unwritten (Natasha Bedingfield). I love the lyrics: we’re all a blank page. It’s up to us to decide what others read from our lives.
- What the World Needs Now (Jackie DeShannon). I love this version from the soundtrack of My Best Friend’s Wedding. I also love the song. I believe the greatest thing in the world is love, and true love is incredibly powerful.
- Woman in Love (Barbra Streisand). I’ve always loved the Bee Gees. Even in the in-between time from when they were awesome to when they weren’t to when they were again. I have always loved the Bee Gees. The album, Guilty, written for Streisand, is a treasure trove of wonderful music. This is a great song to belt out.
- I’d Like to Teach the World to Sing (The New Seekers). Okay, now who isn’t thinking of a Coke commercial right now, am I right? If I could give the world anything, it would be the ability to write it out and sing it out. Both are beautiful forms of communication.
Now I’m scouring my music collection for some rockin’ tunes as well. Maybe I’ll even through in another country hit. Johnny Cash, anyone?
I’m singing my way through 2014.
What music are you singing along with?
And Frankly, My Dear… that’s all she wrote!
Jan 1, 2014 |

BETTER! 2014
Let’s be real: 2013 was a heart breaker, wasn’t it?
Everyone ~ and I mean everyone ~ has a story of hardship within the last 365 days. At the same time, everyone is looking forward to the New Year.
There’s always a sense of fresh. New. Hope. Promise. Something Good.
Am I right? As you’re reading this, aren’t you nodding and mentally going over your resolutions and new to-do’s? Don’t you feel like whatever happened in 2013, today begins the chance to change? A completely blank slate, to shape it however you want it to be.

Sitting Around
Yeah. Me, too.
The last two years I started the New Year with a theme. Two years ago I dared to be an awesome orange. Last year I set boundaries.
Today, I’m starting to be better.

2014: BETTER.
I have a brain bucket full of resolutions and ideas and goals and insights and dreams and warnings and… you get the picture.
I wrote out began my list. Things I want to accomplish/achieve/acquire in 2014:
- Get back to meal planning.
- Read a heck of a lot more.
- Do the Popover Project that I never did last year.
- Finish the interior improvements at Bedford Manor.
- Write. Write. Oh, and write.
- More Mother-Daughter Dates with my daughter.
- More Mother-Daughter Dates with my mother.
- Reach out of my comfort zone more. To people. To locations. To experiences.
- Create new recipes. And lots of them.
- Spend more time in my kitchen creating, less time cleaning.
- Redo the outdoor sprinkler system.
- Buy a reciprocal saw.
- Plant an olive tree.
- Craft more.
- Plant rose bushes.
- Buy fence slats.
- Buy many mason jars. In many sizes. For many reasons.
- Visit the Midwest.
- Get a passport.
- Visit Canada.
- Keep money in my savings account.
And so much more.
And as I looked at my incomplete list, I began to feel… overwhelmed.
This is the part where I channeled my mother’s mantra: “Simplify!” And, in case I didn’t hear her the first ten guzillion times: SIMPLIFY! (Stop yelling, Mom. I get it!)
My list is too long. It’s too exhausting. And honestly, too stressful. I can’t possibly achieve everything on that list.
And I’m not really sure I want to.
Sure, it looks good to put out there all these great goals. Oh, look at Molly’s Resolutions. This Girl’s got gumption! She’s a go-getter for sure! Okay. Quit laughing.
So this year, it’s not about New.
It’s about BETTER.
Taking what I already have, and working with it. Doing more, not different. Fixing, not forgetting. Stop adding to my plate and just enjoy what’s already there.
My goals for 2014 are the same no matter what day of the year it is: Be Better.
Do.
Be.
Dream.
Feel.
Live.
BETTER.
I’ll continue with the meal planning and the budgeting and the home improvements and the writing. Those are not new. If I gain a reciprocal saw and a passport, I’ll be happy. But if I don’t, the world doesn’t end.
I’ll make my life better because I’ll be better for the people in my life. I’ll surround myself with people who get it, who get me. Who encourage me and strengthen me and love me and support me. I’ll reach out more when I need them. And I’ll reach out to them when they’re not reaching out to me. I’ll make girl dates with Pam and Megan and Lisa and Nancy and let them know how they affect me and challenge me to be better.
I’ll let my family know I’m proud of them. For all they do. I’ll make the efforts to let them know I love them. No matter what. Just because they are who they are. And that’s good enough for me. They are always striving to be better, and I appreciate each and every one of them. All the time. And I’ll be better at telling them so.
Reading is something I do but not enough. Two years ago, I challenged myself to read a book every ten days. What was I thinking? In 2014, my goal is 12 books. Total. That’s right. Just one book each month. If I read more than that I’ll count it as a bonus. 12 books in one year is 10 more than I’ve read since last Christmas.
I’ll work on my current writing projects without starting new ones. I’ll finish NOLA and Amara’s Light and Broken Girl. I’ll record episodes of Five Minute Faith. I’ll do whatever I can to be the Writer I say I am.
I’m going to be a better version of myself and make my world a better place.
Not new. Not different.
But fresh. Hopeful. Good.
And definitely
BETTER.

Do Something
What’s your word for 2014?
And Frankly, My Dear… that’s all she wrote!
You may also enjoy reading:
Following Fabian
You can’t see where you’re going if you’re always looking behind.
The Friday Five – STORIES
Amara’s Light: Book One of the Grenalia Chronicles
Doing Something. Good.